Christmas Tree

This is our Christmas Tree; I picked it up today.
What's that, you say? How nice! how cool!
But I for one was a bloody fool.

For in my desire to please my wife
I unknowingly endangered my life.

And came to the gradual conclusion
that my Christmas spirit may be an illusion.

'Cause as pleasing as the sight is to Her,
I, for one,
am allergic
to Balsam Fir.